RHS Diagnosis: Initial Shock And Acceptance - Chapter 3
By the end of July 2023, I had my first doctor's follow-up visit after being hospitalized. Dragging my feet, having a hard time balancing my body, fighting with vertigo and nausea, barely standing, walking into the doctor's office.
However, My doctor wasn't optimistic about my prognosis and thought that my facial synkinesis and facial paralysis would remain, leaving me permanently disabled. When I heard her, I initially lost hope and felt distraught, as though my life seemed absolutely helpless. Recalling the unthinkable personal crises and upheavals since coming to the US, I have been building resilience by coping with my fear and anxiety to survive and overcome adversity. But this, her words, meant death to me! I felt like my life had ended in a doctor's office.
Undeniably, I was facing a personal crisis! My first concern was how to continue my practice with no support system, support myself, and help my clients with limited body function and disabled speech. I couldn't foresee anything, facing the abyss for the first time in my life, I felt emotionally and spiritually homeless.
Finally, after a couple of deep breaths, gathering my strength as little as I had, I screamed inside that I was not done. I was not dying or failing, so I was not accepting this, and I would never surrender to being defeated or destitute.
As my soul arose, roaring inside, despite the odds, I decided to decline to accept her prognosis as the final life sentence. Nevertheless, despite her intention as a savior, she was a powerful catalyst that directed me to a new chapter in my life. I am forever grateful! RHS matched my negative and positive life lessons, and I take accountability for transforming them into win-win.
So I decided then not to be a coward, not run away, or blame, or become a victim, and instead face up to seek healing for my RHS, since I am a spiritual healer. Working to overcome these new physical challenges brought on joy and a sense of victory; adding to it, letting go of my lifetime perfectionism and judgements was just so amazing! During my ICU days and afterward, clients were showing up from as far as Europe, and there was an overwhelming amount of email requests in my inbox. I was utterly confused as to why people were now asking for healing in me; I was incapable of even getting up by myself. I needed healing for myself instead of giving anything, but still, this was guidance to return to my practice and continue my healing work. I still had more to contribute, and a purpose to fulfill.
I believe that better days are ahead. Possibly, advocate for RHS! My dire experience could bring more empathy and insights to clients. A new alchemy of healing journey began! To my freedom in unveiling myself.
Reflecting on this last year, I have been experiencing pain and loss, extreme inconvenience, and searching for meaning in RHS. Yet, I have also found new spiritual growth opportunities. What is my purpose, and how can I serve others to help? My mind and heart are enhanced with gratitude and happiness, literally, as in my body, which is still not thoroughly together. My intuition and psychic ability have increased since the RHS, significantly benefiting my practice. I am immensely grateful to work with clients who searched to find me and trust me to do their miracle healing! This is a gift from RHS, which is the most significant rude awakening, indeed! i
It's been over a year since my diagnosis, and it has been a spectacularly blessed time of progress; the words are indescribable to express everything I have experienced, genuinely magnificent to reach this inner peace!